25: Signs of a Good Feeding
Firstly, I want you to know that you don't need to observe every single thing on this list in order for a feeding to be going well. Some of these may be happening without you overtly noticing it. For example, not everyone listening is going to recognize an infant sucking pattern quickly and easily.
That's okay. If you provided me with a long list about marketing or engineering or career knowledge that you have, I would probably only be able to hook on to a few things. So, the point of this list is definitely not to overwhelm with a long checklist. It's just to paint a picture of what's normal so that you can relax when things are going well.
As we go down the list, don't worry about memorizing it. Not only would it be a lot to memorize, but I've actually already written it all down for you! And, you can easily download it later and reference it whenever you need it (the link is at the bottom of this post). All you have to do is imagine your baby nursing or taking a bottle, whichever is your feeding plan, and let these details fill in the visual for you.
Let's get started. For both breast and bottle fed babies, your baby should easily latch and stay latched. Now, it's okay in the early days when you're practicing if it takes a little time or takes a few tries. That's not what I mean. What I mean is once they get going, there shouldn't be a lot of slurping or coming off or just really an inability to maintain that feeding rhythm.
For breast and bottle, their lips should be flanged out, not tucked in. For breastfeeding, we do expect a deep latch. And this sort of goes for bottle feeding too. It should be more than just the tip of a nipple in your baby's mouth. And for breastfeeding, the nipple and as much areola as possible should be in the baby's mouth.
When it comes to breastfeeding, there should be no pain. A brief initial discomfort can be normal, but it should dissipate quickly. Both breast and bottle fed babies should have rhythmic jaw movements. Biting, chomping, and munching are not expected. For a breastfeeding baby, you'll feel a tug on your nipple whenever your baby sucks because they are creating a negative vacuum in their mouth, which stretches your nipple.
They may have a slower sucking rhythm to start, until your milk starts flowing. Then you may see that they have a little bit of a difference and a change in the pattern that they're sucking. It may seem like deeper, more rhythmic motions. And you may also notice that there's milk leaking from your other breast, unless you're nursing twins (hehe).
Breast and bottle fed babies may demonstrate audible swallowing. That sounds more like a soft “kuh…kuh…kuh”. And sometimes is not very audible with a bottle at all. But coughing, choking, wet, gurgly, or hard swallows; that's not really expected, and that may be a sign that the flow is a little bit fast for them.
Breast and bottle fed babies should be able to maintain a sucking pattern. They'll take brief pauses and breaks as needed to take a breath, and they might get a little wiggly when they need a burp break.
After the feed, you should notice that your breasts are softer, and of course from the bottle you should see an appropriate amount of milk intake. The goal here is not to always make sure they finish every last drop. The baby should feel satiated, and comfortable, kind of like how you feel satisfied after a good, healthy, grounding, full meal.
And of course, all babies should have the appropriate amount of wet and soiled diapers. That's a great sign that they're getting what they need.
Something else that's really important to understand for those of us who get stuck on perfectionism is that there are normal cluster feeding days.
Usually the second night of life, and again around day 10, and that's normal. Many babies also really prefer snuggling and snacking. Maybe late afternoon or for a short kind of window through the day. That's normal as well. So it's important to know that when we talk about these signs of satiation and how your baby should feel satiated after feeds, it’s also possible they may cue again soon. And that it doesn't necessarily mean something is wrong.
So I just want you to know that there is some flexibility when we think about kind of our checklists and schedules and things like that. So cluster feeding is a normal part of the ebb and flow of infant feeding. And it's really not considered a problem unless it's crossing the line into an inconsolable baby 24/7 or outside of that normal ebb and flow.
But in general, if you're checking those boxes, you can feel pretty confident. If you think you'll want to come back to this information in written form you can download the handout here, and check out more free resources here.
One last thing. Would you mind taking a moment to rate this show? It would sure help other mothers find it, and let me know that you're benefiting from the information and that I should keep creating it.
I hope you have a great week, and I'll be back next Tuesday!